October 13, 2004

Dance Partner: Strictly Business or Not

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Our Reader asked...  
Our Feedback... Feb 20, 2004 - Salsera's response
Oct 13, 2004 - Bellasalera's response
   


Our Reader asked...

August 13, 2003 -- Dance Partner : Strictly Business or Not

Do you keep your relationship with your dance partner strictly business? This is a very interesting topic. This can be an emotionally charge topic too. If you would pull back and look at this situation from a distance, the IDEAL situation would be to keep the relationship at a professional level, strictly business. Is this easy? Not at all! Why is that? EMOTIONS! Emotions do funny things to people and if not in the right place or perspective, can and will get in the way of what you are trying to accomplish. People get hurt easier once they are involved emotionally. A good example is when you correct your partner. If your dance partner is just that, your dance partner, he/she will not get offended easily compared to if your dance partner is also your lover. The words that are said to a regular dance partner could be taken the wrong way by your dance partner/lover. Emotions is the culprit

Those that have a dance partner/lover combo have a great understanding of their roles. During practice or while teaching, they understand they are wearing the business hat. It isn't about their relationship. It's about working together as dance partners. During the time they are putting together a dance routine, one plays the role of the teacher and the other as the student. This will flip flop at times and both understand this scenario. They too will have their moments of arguing and will forget what their roles are but they quickly recover and go back to business.

Every situation is going to be different and if you are one of the lucky ones that can separate your romantic relationship from your dancing relationship, congratulations.

So, in your situation with your dance partner, strictly business or not?

"salsero loco"

The Feedback....

February 20, 2004 -- Strictly Business or Not?

Well, let me consider this topic from two angles:

1. I've read many articles and heard many opinions on whether partners should get involved emotionally or not. My conclusion, after reading so much, was that it WOULD be better not to get involved emotionally, BUT... couples who are emotionally involved LOOK BETTER on the dance floor! It's not a RULE, it's only an opinion!

2. I have been and still am emotionally involved with my partner. Here I have a confession to make: it's not official (for reasons I do not want to address...). Most people know we are just best friends. Life is tough...

Well, let me tell you this: unless you have a definite commitment from your dance partner in the love life too, better stay away from sex! It might hurt your feelings badly! When we broke up the first time, I went through hell and gave him hell for it! Also, I quit (at one point, when it became unbearable) going to the same clubs, training together or even speaking to him! We would avoid each other all the time! It was heart-breaking ('cause he's also a very dear friend of mine and a good man!), and it took us a couple of months to get over it!

Now, errrr... we got involved once again! It seems we get along quite well in private and on the dance floor! BUT... make sure the relationship does not hurt the dance!!!! Make sure you do not associate salsa with pain (as I did for months... - it was pure hell, I couldn't even LISTEN to salsa music, and I am the kind that ONLY listens to salsa!)! Keep it separated! In your minds, I mean... And good luck! Salsera

October 13 , 2004 -- Strictly Business or Not?

I don't dance any more, and the reason I don't is because my ex-boyfriend and I, who danced almost exclusively with each other for along time, broke up. It was too hard to go to the clubs afterwards and see each other. So he won the territory. Take a lesson--don't sh** in your own back yard. It may be verrrry tempting to have a romance with your partner, but remember the consequences. -- Bellasalsera


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